What Do Women Want?


China is not a country for old men, you are too old for the women, you want to marry and the ones that, do want to marry you, don’t speak English. I spent five years wishing it weren’t so, only proving that, “not being in a relationship makes you unhappy, and only helps you grow older.” 

I tried bridging the cross-cultural divide by reading John Gray’s manual: Always a victim of senior short term memory loss, I called on my military learning to encapsulate the critical info into, yoUR DoctoR's CV.

UR: Understanding - Respect  

DR: Devotion - Reassurance

CV: Caring - Validation



UNDERSTANDING: This is a challenge, start with their birthday chartJanuary SEVENTEENTH (10d) Day of the HEAVYWEIGHT: Those people born on January 17 are some of the most powerfully direct individuals of the year. This is in large part because they usually have a very clear goal, a firm idea of what it is that they wish to accomplish at any given time. They are also able to effectively assess their chances for success based on past experience and the difficulties that lie ahead.

RESPECT: Treat her as the Chairman CEO of the Partnership

DEVOTION: Pray she doesn't Fire you.

REASSURANCE: Loyalty, be there for her. 

CARING: Honey, how can I help?

VALIDATION: Listen Up! Pay Attention 

Discover why the two of you are together. 

BARACK is the Moon Card to MICHELLE in the Spiritual Spread. Of all the connections that exist among the cards in the deck, the Moon connection is probably the single most powerful one when it comes to decisions about long-term commitments. When someone is our Moon card, we feel very close and comfortable with them. When this connection is found in  the Spiritual Spread, we feel even closer, and at the same time we sense that  we have been together before.

BARACK is the Pluto Card to MICHELLE in the Life Spread. BARACK and MICHELLE share a very powerful connection that is sure to affect them both, but mostly it will affect MICHELLE. Someone who is our Pluto Card has qualities and character traits that will challenge us and inspire  us to change ourselves, whether we like it or not.

MICHELLE is the Saturn Card to BARACK in the Life Spread. Saturn has traditionally been known as the planet of hardship, coldness and difficulties of all kinds. And in fact there are some Saturn relationships in which these qualities predominate. However, there are many Saturn relationships that have other qualities, and in these we see the more positive aspects of Saturn's influence. We cannot predict exactly how this relationship between MICHELLE and BARACK will be affected by this connection because that will depend upon how consciously they choose to apply  the energy of this connection. It can be very constructive or it can be difficult and depressing.

In this relationship BARACK has somehow chosen MICHELLE to be his teacher. Though this may not have been a completely conscious choice, it is so just the same. MICHELLE, being his Saturn Card, will experience a natural inclination to help BARACK by making suggestions for improving his life or career.

Michelle the Clinger:  Maximizer, Diffuse Boundaries

Basic Fear (Wound): Separation and abandonment;  loss of self through loss of contact with parent (partner)
Internal Message: “Don’t need me”
Core Belief:  I can’t get my needs met
Relationship Belief:  I am safe if I hold on to you
Image of Partner: Unavailable;  has no feelings; a rock wall
Relationship to Partner:  Clinging; demanding; attempts to fuse
Core Issue: Separateness
Typical Frustration: You are never there
Recurrent Feeling: Voracious rage and terror

Barack the Avoider:  Minimizer, Rigid Boundaries
Basic Fear (Wound):  Contact may lead to emotional and physical rejection, loss of self through contact with parent (partner).
Internal Message: Don’t be”
Core Belief:  I have no right to exist
Image of Partner:  Demanding, all consuming
Relationship to Partner:  Detached; avoidant
Core Issue:  Too much togetherness;  too many feelings;  too much chaos
Typical Frustration:  You hate me;  you feel too much
Recurrent Feeling:  Terror and rage


Leave a comment

Please note, comments must be approved before they are published